Monthly Archives: April 2015

My Parents

Sometimes I get questions about my parents. Mostly what they think and how they treat me now.

I realize that, based on what I’ve written, it may come across that I’ve cut them off or that we have no relationship.

My parents are amazing people. They are loving and supporting of me.

 

I call my parents several times a week and we talk about my current life. I appreciate their input and ask for their advice. Getting to this place hasn’t been easy or fun. I’ve had difficult conversations with them. But it’s been worth it. The important relationships are worth the difficult conversations.

Recently my family started a group text with all my siblings and parents and we were texting fun pictures and comments. My sister said it best ‘I never thought we’d do this’. Me either.

The progress my family has made has been incredible. I still have 2nd parents (everyone should!) but my parents are my parents. I love them. I value them and their opinion.

 

How did I get here? What were the changes that led to this different and new relationship?

There isn’t an easy answer. My own path of healing has been a huge part of the change. Also the phrase ‘my childhood was needed for the life I have now’ has been important for me to settle into and accept and believe and receive. I’m starting to see the wisdom in those words. But believing them means not blaming and throwing my hurt and pain at my parents. It means carefully working through the memories and pain to uncover the truth of who I am.

I can’t say ‘I can’t ____ because my parents’ or ‘well it’s because my parents…..’ or  any other phrase the puts the blame on someone else.
Because my past, my childhood, is a gift if I decide to accept it as such.